בארטלט למען אמריקה

: Is Toby on his way?a
: Yeah.a
: C.J.?a
: Yeah.a
: Why aren't they here now?a
: They didn't know it was raining, sir.a
: Nothing like surrounding yourself with the best and the brightest, Charlie.a





: Just be wrong. Just stand there in your wrongness and be wrong and get used to it.a





: We spent millions of dollars developing a pen that could write in space. Do you know what the Russians did?a
: Used a pencil?a
: Used a pencil.a





: You guys are idiots, you know that?a
: In our own defense, we do, actually, know that.a

: you know that line you're not supposed to cross with the president?a
: I'm coming up to it?a
: No, look behind you.a





: Don't play dumb with me.a
: No, honestly, I am dumb. Most of the time I'm playing smart.a





: Where are you going?a
: Where are YOU going?a
: I was following you.a
: I was following YOU. Alright, don't tell anyone this happened, okay?a





: Toby, do you really think it's a good idea to invite people to dinner and then to tell them exactly what they're doing wrong with their lives?a
: Absolutely, otherwise it's just a waste of food.a





: What was the problem with the interview?a
: There was no problem with the interview. Except it looked like you discovered there was a child labor problem in the world because a fourteen-year-old boy named Jeffrey just told you about it this morning.
: I do not believe that is true.a
: And I do not believe exercise is going to make me any healthier, but I didn't go to medical school. You did. You say so, and I go to the gym.a





: All I'm saying is, if you were in an accident, I wouldn't stop to get a beer.a
: If you were in an accident, I wouldn't stop for red lights.a





: How do you feel there, Big Guy?a
: Like I just got screwed with my pants on.a

: I want to speak to your supervisor.a
: My supervisor? Well, I'm personal aide to the President, so right now my supervisor is kinda busy looking for a back door to throw you out of. But I'll let him know.a





: Good writers borrow from other writers, great writers steal from them outright.a





: I'd get in trouble with the First Lady!a
: Welcome to the club, Danny. We had jackets made.a





: Hey, why don't we just give Korea the sixty billion in exchange for not bombing us?a
: It's a wonder you're not on the National Secuirty Council.
: I know, I feel like they're missing an important voice.a





: We're Batman and Robin!a
: Which one's which?a
: Look at me, Sam. Am I Robin?a





: My getting killed would be bad enough, but that is not the nightmare scenario. The nightmare scenario, sweetheart, is you getting kidnapped. You go out to a bar or a party in some club and you get up and you go to the restroom and somebody comes from behind and puts his hand across your mouth and drags you out the back door. You're so petrified you don't even notice the bodies of a few Secret Service agents laying on the ground with bullet holes in their heads. Then you're driven away in the car. It's a big party with lots of noise and lots of people coming and going, and it's a half hour before someone says: "Hey, where's Zoey?" It's another fifteen minutes before the first phone call. It's another hour and a half before anyone even THINKS to shut down all the airports. Now we're off to the races. You're tied to a chair in a cargo shack somewhere in the middle of Uganda and I am told that I have 72 hours to get Israel to free 460 imprisoned terrorists. So I'm on the phone pleading with Binyamin and he's saying: "I'm sorry, Mr. President, but Israel simply does not negotiate with terrorists, period, it's the only way we can survive." So now we got a new problem because this country no longer has a Commander-in-chief, but a father going out of his mind because his little girl is in a shack somewhere in the middle of Uganda with a gun to her head. Do you get it?a